Ultimate Overwatch Wife List

When Overwatch first came out I was a bit reluctant to play it. After all I had a brief spell playing TF2 but the shine had long gone from a game where the characters were all male and pretty one-dimensional. All I had to go on with Overwatch was a single image of a very buff, pink haired lady, who I either wanted to wife or be. It helped that at the time I had that exact hair cut. Eventually the game was released to rave reviews, but still I hung back – who was this slim, brunette woman who was on the posters now? Where was my beautiful butch lady? A year on and it seemed like delight in Overwatch refused to abate – I read about the varied personalities of characters and how, despite class attributes, no two class characters were the same. Then there was that comic. Tracer was a lesbian. The dudebros were furious but I was elated. It was time, I decided. So I started playing Overwatch and of course, I went straight to playing as Zarya – after all this time, how could I not? It was a steep learning curve – it turns out she is one of the more difficult characters to play as, but I loved it. I’m terrible at shooters and I die again and again, but playing as this beautiful, strong woman I felt as powerful as she looked. I began to look further and explore playing as other characters and classes. Now I come back to four main characters, all women, all fantastic in their own ways. And of course, I’m dreadful at playing at all of them. Here it is: my Ultimate Overwatch Wife List.


Strong Wife
Zarya was the first character from Overwatch I truly fell in love with. When it came time for me to pick a character to play as there was no question – she was it. I still want to cosplay her despite now being blonde instead of pink, and being not even remotely chunky enough. I hold out hope for the day I am “swol” enough to do this beautiful soft butch justice.
As I mentioned previously there was a steep learning curve, exacerbated by the fact that Zarya has relatively low health and I tend to die before anyone can heal me. These days tho I take pride in maintaining Zarya as my main, especially if there is a healer around to maintain me. I don’t die as often as I used to and am actually pretty good at holding my own when playing as her these days. It helps being able to shield myself while attacking, because I do love a good run-up to my enemies. No matter how many characters are introduced, Zarya will always be my fave and hold a special place in my heart.


Sneaky Wife
What can I say about Sombra other than that she’s so very cool? I absolutely love her style and character, even if I am actually the worst at playing as her. Seriously, I cannot maintain any sort of run and die almost as soon as I hit combat but if you think that will stop me then you are very wrong, my friend. I loved her from the moment I saw the “Infiltration” short and immediately fell in love with her. She is both so cool and so very cute, a slightly evil nerd who I would die for. I’m extremely sad that I can’t cosplay her, but I have seen so many latina girls cosplay her and look fabulous I wouldn’t even begin to want to compete with that!


Smart Wife
I actually started playing Symmetra because a friend of mine loved her and I thought I should give it a shot. Similar to Zarya, I love the ability to both protect myself and shoot people at the same time. Playing as Symmetra comes with he added benefit that I don’t die nearly quite as often when I play as her. Like Zarya, she has the ability to shield herself while attacking – something that saves my life quite a bit (even if I still die quite a lot). Again, like Zarya, Symmetra has the ability to either fire a round of single shots or do damage with a photon beam. As the beam causes quite a bit of damage I can definitely say that I am a fan of that mode of attack! I’m also a bit fan of having turrets that will do my dirty work for me – I can just plonk them down and run like hell!
I love both Symmetra’s character design and personality, she is so delightfully complex! She fights for a future that she believes in and a keen sense of aesthetics which I can strongly admire. With so many fantastic new characters being released it’s been a while since I played as her, but I can’t wait to head back in.


Science Wife
Oh wow finally a character I can cosplay. I’d be lying if I said that wasn’t my first reaction to Moira’s release. She’s just got such a sense of style which speaks to 15-year-old emo me on an emotional level. Then I started playing as her and daaaaaamn it’s so good. I always enjoy playing a class that lets me use the damage I’ve taken from my enemies to heal myself (catch me playing necromancers in most RPGs). On top of this, I love being able to play as a chaotic-neutral healer who can easily kill people without having to switch weapons! Before this I would occasionally play as Mercy but would get so frustrated that I would have to switch weapons just so I don’t end up dying when attacked! Of course, Moira comes with the same problem that most healer characters have which isn’t purely related to her but to the fact that everyone wants to be healed but no one wants to protect the healer! The amount of times players have run away from me while I’ve been trying to heal their critically-wounded butts is infuriating. Moira has quickly risen to be one of my favourite characters to play as however, and these days I find myself alternating between her and Zarya more and more often.

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